I have spent my whole life looking out for you both, from playing, arguing, splitting you up, making sure your ok and even fighting off bullies. I’ve grown with you and watched you turn from boys to men, eventually accepting I am now the shortest sibling. I have been and always will be one of your greatest supporters whether that’s in life, your work, dreams or on a football pitch, cricket field or in crocodile and otter enclosures. Lots has changed most expected, we’ve moved out, away from one another, and past our everyday interactions are now our monthly texts or a call. But I will never stop being your sister and looking out for you. However I am now in a place I thought I would never be. I welcomed into this world my beautiful son and your nephew, another boy who’s changed my world for the better. He reminds me of you both each day and the bond we have is just as unbreakable. I never thought in a million years someone would come as close to you two in wanting what’s best for you. The thing is I know have to accept what would be best for you two wouldn’t be what best for him. I’ve always made sure I could protect you both from the realities of situations and sugarcoat it but this is one thing I can’t cover up. I as your sister want to be the one who takes one for the team like always but I can’t now. And that’s kills me to say and feel, and will be something I doubt I will ever get over. If there was a way I could test positive so you both were negative I would of jumped at it, but I have someone holding my hand now who needs me to be there and be negative so he can be free of this horrible disease. How wrong is that? I’m angry, I’m beyond frustrated and scared. I hope more than anything in this world all three of us are spared of this disease and our lives could in some way be as close to normal again. I want our mum and dad to not be torn between all the different scernios of results and what that means for our family. I don’t want any of us to be the unlucky one or the only negative one but that is the reality of this. Maybe just maybe we hit the jackpot and all get the all clear. Just know whatever happens, I am still your sister and have and always will look out for you both. Ohana always.
Love you always,
Your big (now little) but forever proud sister,
Charlie
xxx
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